Life Lag

Today’s a dark, rainy day.

rain

It kinda fits how I’m feeling today.

Yesterday, I had all these plans to get up early1, go to CrossFit, and get a bunch of errands run by noon.

What really happened was that I forgot to set my alarm and I woke up late. Also, I felt like crap and skipped CF. Finally, all I’ve managed to do this morning is make breakfast at 11am and start writing this post. 😐

Not good.

Actually, I can’t wait for this month to be over with.

Why, you ask?

Due to a reschedule of one work trip from February to March, I will be traveling or at a work event most of this month. I was just in Hawaii for a week (here is where you tell me to STFU) with my team, I’m now back for 5 days, then I’m off to London (and WordCamp London!) with one of our product teams for another week. Two days after I get back, I’m at the first Press Publish event here in Portland where I have three presentations to give.

Boo hoo, Carolyn. Your life is so hard.

No, I get it. I’m very lucky to have this life and I love my job. I just didn’t foresee how much anxiety all this stuff happening at the same time would generate. Just so I can get it off my chest…

  • My team meetup was all about productivity and efficiency and I’m trying to put a lot of new things into practice.
  • I’m helping the product team at their meetup with a major redesign where they need my documentation skills.
  • Helping at WordCamp London (while this isn’t anxiety-generating, it’s still one more thing.)
  • Needing to come up with three presentations in the next 8 days. While traveling and being at this meetup/WordCamp. 😐
  • Organizing, testing, and documenting a new feature that I hope to have ready by the end of the month. Thankfully I have one of my awesome coworker developers helping me with the code bits of this, but there are still a lot of tasks to complete. :weary:
  • Jet lag.
  • Press Publish event. This is the first event of its kind and I don’t know what to expect. Which would give me a bit of anxiety on its own. But with everything else above? EEK!

You might say “why is jet lag on that list?” Well, when I came back from Hawaii – which is only 3hrs behind Portland – I had a red eye flight and it took me a good day or two to get over the time shift. Now I’m going 7hrs ahead to go to London – I’m afraid I’m going to be a zombie for most of the time I’m there, only to get used to it just in time to come home.

ANXIETY.

anxiety

What’s the solution? I haven’t a clue. All I know is I’m working all weekend to try and get some of this presentation work finished before I leave for London. There’s also wanting to spend time with my husband since I’ll be away for most of this month. Also, consoling my poor Pixel kitty who seems to have picked up the mantle of “make Dad’s life hell when Mom is gone on a meetup” from Chester. But instead of destroying everything, she wants nothing to do with Tim – like actively shuns him – and goes throughout the house looking for me and moping when she doesn’t find me. Poor kitty.

Back to my anxiety.

All I’m saying is that there’s a lot going on and I’m freaking out a bit on the inside about it. Will I overcome these anxiety hurdles? Hell yeah, I will! It doesn’t make it easier to tell my inner spaz to STFU, though.

I probably should take some time off right after all this nonsense to reset myself.

Anyway, to end on a more positive note, here are some photos from Kauai:

——
1 – Trying to go to bed earlier to help reduce the jet lag when I go to London.

If you came here right away before reading the rest of the post, this will make more sense after you read the whole thing. Clearly, my plan of “go to bed early, get up early” is not working.

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