Onward and Upward

I decided to try a new theme on the blog. I kinda like it.

This weekend, we had a good friend of ours visit from Minneapolis. His wife is off galavanting with her friends in Europe, and we convinced him to come hang out with us for a few days. We’ve been both feeling a bit homesick, so it was awesome seeing a familiar face.

It was a lot of fun! On Friday, we took a rainy drive to the coast where we enjoyed some burritos and toured the Tillamook cheese factory. Yesterday, we took a tour of wine country and did all sorts of touristy stuff.

Side note: touring wineries (and doing wine tastings) is exhausting!

Now that we took him back to the airport this morning, we have a full day of doing nothing. Well, “nothing” in that we don’t have plans. But I have some plans of my own.

After seeing some weight creep back on the past few months and our eating habits devolving into something resembling a character in the movie Idiocracy, it’s time to hammer down.

Seeing photos of myself at my company’s Grand Meetup didn’t help either. When did I become so old and stodgy? Who’s that overweight old lady? OHMYFUCKINGGOD IT’S ME.

Thus, we’re going back to the Near-Paleo diet we had such success with. No grains, no dairy, and for the first week or so, no booze. I know I say that every other goddamn time I do these things, but I need to focus on other goals I want to do and boozing it up doesn’t help with those goals.

How can I go wrong with food like this?

The other thing I’m going back to is my exercise routine. I need to get back to running at least three times a week and I’ve only taken advantage of the fitness center in my apartment complex ONCE since we moved in over a month ago. ONCE.

I also want to make sure I’m hitting my Fitbit step goal every day. Ten thousand steps is not a huge thing to do.

Does it sound like I’m trying to bite off more than I can chew? Perhaps. But I want to tackle this. Fuck feeling sorry for myself and making excuses. Time to put up or shut up. That’s what this blog is all about, right?

Going grocery shopping today and the plan for the week is:

Monday: Run
Tuesday: Upper body strength training
Wednesday: Run
Thursday: Lower body strength training
Friday: Rest
Saturday: Run
Sunday: Walking with hubby

Should be doable. I’m not setting distance goals for the running as that would be a one-way ticket to Injuryville, and I don’t want to go there.

Will post an update next week to see how I did! Wish me luck!

The Best Laid Plans.

Well, that whole “not drinking until my birthday?” goal…that made it a whole 4 days. Thanks Moose.

You know how some people are stress eaters? I’m a stress wine drinker!

courtneywine

There were a few stressful days in my personal life, attending the funeral of a dear friend’s mother, and the insane cold weather all culminated in me being a bit depressed1 and weak to the pull of “let’s go out to dinner and have some wine.” Which turns into another glass of wine…

My go-to stress reliever of going for a long run is more complicated in the winter2. Instead of just being able to throw on my shoes and go out the door, I have to dress to go out in the sub-zero temperatures, drive the 10 minutes to my gym, get redressed to exercise, then meander my way to where the treadmills are in my warehouse-sized gym. Add the reverse procedure to that and my 40 minute run turns into a nearly 1.5 hours of nonsense.

If only I could buy a plane ticket to somewhere where I don’t have to bundle up in wool socks and 3 layers of clothing to feel warm. But, that’s not happening anytime soon.

My normal tendency is to really beat myself up over the slip in my goals. Like serious “you’re such a huge fucking fat failure” and “you’re worthless” kind of flogging. I think that mindset of self-loathing has fueled my struggles with my own weight my entire life and it’s a hard one to shake.

However, I have some amazing friends who tell me I’m awesome and I keep telling myself that I am not a failure and am beautiful. Even if I don’t necessarily believe it 100% yet.

Thanks, Senator Franken!
Thanks, Senator Franken!

I’m using this blog to be honest and open about things and I don’t want this to turn into a pity party where you all cheer “you’re awesome, Carolyn!” so I feel better. That’s not it at all.

I’m just writing this in the hopes that it helps someone else not hate themselves because they ate those donuts or drank those beers when they swore they wouldn’t. It’s about embracing yourself as a person – one who isn’t perfect and one who is going to fall flat on their face every once in a while. I just want to get to the point where I can just dust myself off and keep moving towards my goals without having to berate myself for falling down in the first place.

Well that got deep. Sorry about that.

I’ll be back with more fart jokes and nonsense soon. 🙂

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1 – I really, really don’t like winter. I don’t know if I’m at seasonal affective disorder levels of depression about it – but man I’m sick of being cold by this time of the winter season.

2 – Despite successfully running the Polar Dash, I do not run outside unless it’s above 40F.